It's 3:45 am. I can't sleep. I've been lying here for almost an hour pondering the events that are going to happen tomorrow. I am giddy with excitement. I remember going to the airport when Masen came home and the overwhelming flood of emotion that came over me as he came down the escalator. He was the last one off the plane. I'm sure he did that on purpose just to torture his family. That's just cruel. Mean. Torturous. I'm sure you would never do that to your family. Right?
Yesterday Rylee spoke in church. She did an amazing job. She made everyone laugh and cry. She recounted some spiritual experiences and some funny ones. She really kept the audience captivated. Later we headed to Spanky's to s big party in her honor. She's excited and scared as she heads off to Russia on Wednesday.
We had Stake Conference yesterday. When we sang "Called to Serve", I had a complete meltdown. I still remember singing that in the MTC many years ago and the emotion of that song still overcomes me. Mikayla was conducting the song and kept looking at me wondering what was going on. I kept hearing your words echo in my head: "Mom, pull yourself together". I did the best I could.
I remember being in your shoes as I prepared to leave Spain. For me it was harder that leaving home. I knew I would never see all the people that I had grown attached to again. All the people I had learned to love through serving and who had been my entire life I had to say goodbye to. It seemed more permanent than saying goodbye to my family and friends back home. It's a bitter sweet day for sure. Lucky for me, this time I am on the sweet end.
I cant wait to see you again. I miss you like crazy. I know that the Lord has comforted me through your entire mission and has made me feel peace and contentment. If I would have felt for two whole years, the way I have for he last week, I don't know if I could have endured. I have been basket case. I so excited I can hardly contain myself, yet I am scared for you as you plot out your future. I know this will be a hard adjustment as you transition back into real life. But just know that it has been done by many before you and you will eventually find your place in this world.
I will be waiting with open arms. I am expecting a great big, bear hug from you. I am counting the hours.
Love, Mom
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